In November of 2020 I heard the words nobody wants to hear… especially with their first pregnancy: “I… I’m sorry Ms. Fitzpatrick… I can’t find a heart beat… and things aren’t looking so good…” the seasoned ultrasound tech proceeds to show me how the entire right side of my uterus was inflamed, my fallopian tube was blocked, and I had large cysts EVERYWHERE on both ovaries. She told me that she’s obviously not a doctor (This was an elective ultrasound place), but that from the looks of it I needed to rush myself to the Cleveland Clinic Martin North emergency room as it looks like I could have an ectopic pregnancy.
I thanked her for her time and proceeded to walk out the door past all the beaming, excited parents-to-be and as soon as I walked out the door and that evening air hit my face, I immediately began bawling my eyes out. As I drove a few blocks over to the ER I remember calling my fiancé in a panic, absolutely hysterical, that our surprise engagement present that we had just wrapped our heads around, was no longer.
As I sat in the emergency room parking lot he prompted me to take some deep breaths and I’ll never forget him saying “You’re the one always telling me that stuffs going to be okay in the end. Now it’s my turn, okay?”. After that I walked into the ER by myself due to COVID, and luckily it wasn’t ectopic, but I still was given the unfortunate news, alone, with no cell signal to keep family easily updated or to reach out for support while waiting for test results. My fiancé couldn’t even hear the words from the nurse practitioner himself, the hardest thing I’ve ever done is tell him that it was official… our baby hadn’t made it.
After healing and going through a whole list of postpartum health issues, I found out about Madison’s Miracles and the lovely folks involved took me right in, and made me feel so loved and supported.
And for that I’ll be forever grateful- so please join me in supporting a cause that means so much to my family and I <3.
Support your favorite chef for the 6th Annual Celebrity Chef nights. Two nights of fun and entertainment. Each chef is raising money to support the mission of Madison's Miracles for Pregnancy and Infant Loss.